Today we are exploring humility, a word that is easy to throw around but hard to genuinely embody. In our modern world, where self-promotion is deemed necessary for success, being humble can even be seen as negative. And we are all guilty, at times, of proclaiming humility though our words and actions suggest otherwise. But can we cultivate true humility by looking at it differently?
The Oxford English Dictionary defines humility as 'a modest view of one's own importance'. The word modest is a good one because it conveys balance between thinking too lowly of ourselves and being overconfident. I love the saying 'Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less'. (Rick Warren, C.S. Lewis). This saying allows me to reframe humility as a quiet superpower, a trait that permits us to support our own worth without taking anything away from others. When we cultivate this kind of humility, the benefits become apparent quite quickly.
Being humble allows us to get out of our own way, by shedding the personas we sometimes trap ourselves in. Trying to appear knowledgeable and confident takes a lot of energy. Humility frees us to redirect that energy to what we are doing rather than worrying about how others perceive us. When our focus is on learning, working hard and doing our best, we tend to bring more curiosity and motivation to the task at hand. Paradoxically, this can lead to true knowledge and inner confidence that comes through us naturally, without having to try so hard to project those qualities. In other words, it allows us to be more comfortable in our own skin.
Humility also allows us to connect more easily with others, and we might find ourselves drawn to people who exude this grounded quality. When we are not consumed with ourselves, we are better able to see the good in others, to see what they have to teach us, and support their triumphs or struggles. This not only applies to other people, but to animals, trees and nature as a whole. When we humble ourselves, we are able to maintain a healthy perspective about our place in a larger environment. Humility reminds us of how connected and interdependent we all are and revives our sense of awe at the complexity, scale and power of nature.
Finally, humility makes us more accepting of the limits of our knowledge. In his New York Times column, journalist David Leonhardt recently penned a fascinating piece on hubris and humility. He says, 'The trouble is that human beings tend to overstate their ability to predict events. People who can resist that hubris — who can mix knowledge with humility — are often at a competitive advantage.' It is easy to believe that we humans are all knowing, given our achievements throughout history. Our technological prowess can make us feel invincible. Yet we need only look at climate change, a problem of our own making, to realize that we cannot always understand or predict the long-term impact of our collective actions.
On a more personal level, humility makes us feel less entitled, more able to accept uncertainty and more willing to keep striving knowing we may not always get what we want. It can also make us more grateful for all that we already have. I will give the last word to author David Steindl-Rast who is known for his teachings on gratitude. He beautifully sums up humility as 'that down to earth quality that has nothing in common with humiliation but makes us stand tall and acknowledge both the humus that feeds us and the stars to which we aspire. May I learn to practice, and to honour in others, this sparking humility, which is the dignity that we, as human beings, cannot afford to lose'.
Hopefully those powerful words will help you ponder what role humility might play in your life.
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